How to Turn Your Life Around, by Tom Monson
I received an email from a teen named Amy. She told me about her fears and how she felt her life was headed in the wrong direction. Basically, she was asking, “How can I turn my life around?”
Hi Amy, that’s a big question, but the answer is simpler than you might think. If you want to turn your life around, you’ve got to start by changing the way you think. Your thoughts are like the foundation of a house—everything you build on top of them depends on how strong they are. If your mind is full of doubts, fears, or negativity, it’s going to be hard to move forward. But if you can shift the way you think, you’ll start to see real changes in your life.
Let’s start with this: your mind is like the captain of a ship. If the captain doesn’t adjust the course, the ship keeps heading in the same direction. So, if your life isn’t heading where you want it to go, you’ve got to take control of the wheel. The good news? You’re the captain. The tricky part? Most people don’t realize they’ve been letting their old habits, fears, and doubts do the steering. If you want to turn your life around, you have to start by changing the way you think.
The first step is paying close attention to your thoughts. What’s going on up there? Are your thoughts lifting you up, or are they dragging you down? If you find yourself thinking things like, “I’m not good enough,” or “I’ll never change,” stop and challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself, “Is this really true? Who says I can’t change?” Most of the time, those thoughts aren’t facts—they’re just beliefs you’ve picked up along the way. And here’s the thing: you don’t have to keep believing them. Turning your life around starts with changing the way you think about yourself and what’s possible.
Once you start catching those negative thoughts, it’s time to replace them with better ones. For example, instead of saying, “I can’t do this,” replace it with, “I’m learning, and I’ll get better with time.” Write this down, say it out loud, and remind yourself of it every day. At first, it might feel strange, but keep at it. Your brain believes what you repeatedly tell it. That’s why changing the way you think is so powerful—it literally rewires your mind to see new opportunities and solutions.
But here’s something important, Amy: It’s not just about thinking differently. You’ve got to back it up with action. Let’s say you’ve started telling yourself, “I’m capable of handling challenges.” That’s a great mindset to have, but now you need to act like it. Start doing small things that reflect this belief. Take on a task that scares you a little. Speak up when you normally wouldn’t. The more you act in line with your new thoughts, the more you’ll reinforce those beliefs. That’s how changing the way you think creates real change in your life.
Here’s another tip: pay attention to the people you spend time with. If you’re surrounded by negativity—people who doubt you, criticize you, or don’t believe in change—it’s going to be harder to move forward. Instead, find people who encourage you and believe in your potential. If you can’t find those people right away, that’s okay. Read books, listen to podcasts, or watch videos from people who inspire you. You can still surround yourself with positive voices, even if they’re not in the same room as you.
Now, let’s be honest: changing your life isn’t going to happen overnight. It takes time, patience, and consistency. You’ll have days when those old, negative thoughts creep back in. That’s normal. The key is to notice it when it happens and gently remind yourself of the new way you’re thinking. It’s like planting a garden. You have to keep watering it, pulling out the weeds, and letting it grow. Over time, those new thoughts will take root, and your life will start to change.
So, Amy, if you want to turn your life around, focus on this: Start by changing the way you think. Watch your thoughts carefully, replace the ones that don’t serve you, and take small actions that match the life you want to create. Surround yourself with positive influences, and be patient with yourself as you grow. You’re the captain of your ship, and you get to decide where it goes. Change the way you think, and you’ll be amazed at how much your life can change. You’ve got this!
I wrote a small book a few years ago that will help you understand that how you think affects everything in your life. You can find it at Amazon and the name of it is How You Think.
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